It is kind of overwhelming to realize how long I have been in this (co-dependent) pattern. And I guess hard to take responsibility for my part. I always thought it was everyone else’s fault.

I wanted to follow up and give you some writing prompts. I can’t encourage writing enough— it literally gets you out of destructive thought patterns and into your creative brain. Please give them a try, and be patient with yourself. This is a process, but doing some writing will really jump-start our sessions!

  1. Write a letter to co-dependency (or love addiction). What has it cost you to be in this pattern? What parts of yourself have been lost or compromised? This is important to acknowledge, and refer to whenever you are sliding back into old patterns. Keep this letter handy, and look at it when you forget the high costs of not focusing on your own needs in a healthy way.
  2. Write a letter to your parent or parents, and let them know what you wish you could have received from them at an early age. What words, physical affection, beliefs, values, or encouragement did you want/ crave/ miss? Let them know what it would have meant to have received unconditional love and belief in your core self/ unique strengths. What did you want them to see and nurture in you? What would be different for you, if somehow you were truly nurtured to be everything you are meant to be? How would you feel about the world, about love, and what you look for in a person to love?
  3. What emotions are coming up? Allow them. Write a little about the feelings and observations. What surprises you? Allow yourself to soak in and receive what came through in regard to true love and nurturing— allow some slow breaths and allow your feelings to breathe as well. The nurturing is very real— even though it isn’t coming from your parents directly. It is coming though divine wisdom, beyond what your parents were capable of. When your brain hears these messages and fires neurons that heal— it is the same as having the actual experience. Your brain doesn’t know that difference. Seriously. Physically, you are creating new neural pathways of possibility; and spiritually, you are healing the pain/ doubt that you have carried for so long.

Thank you for being open and brave, even thought parts of you are not believing you can change, or maybe even deserve to change. Even though you aren’t ready to let go of your past relationship, it’s okay. Please just do what you can and trust the process. Turn off the critic in your brain for a minute, and just try what I suggest.

It is a privilege to help you work through these things.
Call or text if you need clarification or support.
You’ve got this!